No Reds.. No Greens.. Only Blues!!

What is happening to me now?
I am quite busy at work these days. Not really great work. But then onsite and good work rarely go together. Do they?

Jale Pe Namak: Have loads of documentation work. A process document for everything I do, a technical document as a contribution to knowledge sharing activities, a BoK as a centre of excellence initiative.. And of course, everything here works with deadlines. I’m dead.

More: There are lots of problem at home (here, I mean). Ego clashes, emotional clashes, ‘you-name-it’ clashes. So far I have managed to play just the part of the audience. And I’ll try my best to avoid being a participant. But just to have such a disturbed environment is a torture. I am incapable of solving these issues since I don’t know what the issue is. Also I don’t really know the people who are involved, I don’t know how they think, I don’t know what they feel. But how indifferent can I be to what is going around me. I feel weird.

I want to go back to India. And I am pushing a lot for that. Sometimes I feel that I am going to land into more trouble if I get back there.. Be it in the work front or the personal front.. Nevertheless, I chant the ‘I wanna go back’ mantra all the time. When will that happen? What will happen after that? I don’t know.

In between all this I go for movies, eat-out, visit places, go for project parties, crack jokes, have fun.. But once these hungamas are over. I feel blank. Emotionless.
And I am sure every person around me here feels the same.. All eyes have the same vacant look.. Everybody is tired..

Am I slowly losing myself to this crazy world? Or have I just stepped into the real world?

Chak De India!

Hey, don't you roll your eyes and think, 'Writing about Chak De now?'! Unfortunately, Chak De got released in Ipswich only this Sunday and I watched it yesterday. Yes, I loved it! :)



I am not a Shahrukh fan. Everything he does looks like 'acting' to me. He is a good actor.. but he always reminds me that he is just acting, and in case he starts crying, God save me!
Even in this movie, I feel that Shahrukh has done a good job. Nothing to 'Ooh Aah' about. But his team rocks! Every single girl is so different from each other.. So simple.. And so real.. Such faces makes it easier to relate to.. You feel that its the girl next door who is going out and proving her mettle to the world and then you feel so happy, so proud.

The film brings to our notice a few things..
* It shows how a small mistake makes an Indian crowd make dangerous judgements!
* The way we Indians still see ourselves divided in the name of states.
* The fate of hockey in India
* The fate of women as sports players. In fact, women in any career face difficulties. But a career in sports makes it worse..

I know its just a movie, but the fact that its inspired from a true story makes it a lot more closer to the heart. Hope all of you liked it too!

1 + 4 + 0 + 8 = 13

As you would have guessed, watched the movie 1408. It had been a long time since I watched a scary movie, and this one made up for it quite well.




In this movie, Michael Enslin(John Cusack) is a writer who writes about the 'supposedly' haunted locations. He is a non-believer and hence, goes into such hotels, stays there overnight and reveals to the world that its all made up. But for once, he is trapped in room 1408 of hotel Dolphin. And we go as crazy as him in trying to get out from there!
If you are looking for some thrill, go watch it.

Destiny or Accident?

I have always thought a lot about life; its meaning.. its purpose.. Even as a child, I used to do that. Maybe because I grew up hearing Dad tell about life, 'karma', different 'janma's' and so on. A lot of them made sense to me, a lot of them did not. There were heated debates on God between my Dad and my cousins, long discussions about these with my sister. And all this got me thinking.

And there is one question I ask myself many times.. Is life destined to be or is it just an accident?

It surely feels better to think of life as a destiny. To think that I had to be born to my parents.. that I had to grow up the way I did.. that everything I do is already destined. Of course, that does not mean that I do not try to do anything from my side. I try.. try hard for the best.. but understand that only that will happen, that what is destined.

On the other side, its inspiring to say that I make my own destiny. Its true that a vision, determination and hard work can achieve almost anything.. But isn't there an element of uncertainty everywhere in life? Can I even claim a single thing about future with 100% surety? I am afraid not. I cannot even say that I'll publish this post, because at the end, I am not sure of my life the next moment. So, that says that life is not in my hands.

I just watched Forrest Gump. And liked it a lot. That got me into writing all this. And as he finally says, I guess life is a mixture of both.. destiny and accidents, miracles and coincidences, luck and hard work. Ain't it?

Whats in a birthday?

This is what I asked myself on my birthday this year.

Birthdays used to be sooo exciting years ago. Hey, I never used to sleep the previous night! There was no blowing of candles, no cutting of cakes. There were no balloons or ribbons in the house and nobody was invited for a party. There were not even flowers or gifts! But still there was more that enough reason for excitement.. new dress, chocolates and greeting cards! :)

A week before my birthday, I used to calculate and re-calculate how many chocolates I needed. Strength of the class + atleast 5 chocs each for my best buddies + principal + all teachers + few friends from other divisions + bus mates + bus driver + cleaner + relatives + neighbours + .. The list went on. My mom would somehow convince me on cutting short the list. The next discussion was on which chocolate to buy. After all the arguments, the chocolates would arrive. I would get them all out of the packet.. on to the floor. And then the counting began! I would get them into separate boxes.. One for bus.. One for class.. One for teachers.. Phew.. And go to sleep late at night to end up not sleeping at all!

But I wouldn't be a bit tired the next day. Would trot around proudly with my new dress. I would smile at all the blue-n-white uniforms around. I was the star of the day! Would sit in class, full of excitement, and when the teacher walked in, would go to her with this box. And then the whole class got up and sang 'Happy Birthday To you....' Oh, how wonderful it felt.

But whatever I say, I did feel special even on this birthday with all the wishes from my loved ones. Thanks a lot for them. You made my day!

When it got sunny..

The last weekend was the warmest weekend of the year in UK! The temperature touched 30C in London!! We'll give a 'So?' as a response, but people here may almost faint.. So, this is what happened that weekend..

We lazy bums(Yeah, I am slowly graduating into one) did not even get out of the house. But we had the window open and on the warm Saturday noon, I sat by the window gazing at the small green park below. There were small kids in swimsuits. Why swimsuits, I thought. Maybe to get more of the sun, I guessed. But no.. The action had not yet started. All of them suddenly rushed to their homes on all four sides of the park. Whats happening? It was suspense time for me. Then, there came the first one.. a short n stout boy holding a pail of water.. Whats going on?? Then came two girls with two inflated baths.. a small one and a big one. Now I was getting the picture and that got me all hooked up. This boy poured his first bucket of water into the bath.. Then came out all the little darlings.. with how much ever water they could carry.. One in a milk can.. Another in a mug and a teeny weeny girl, in a glass!!! Yes she made some 10 trips home and back, slowly tiptoeing, carrying water in a glass!! I really felt like helping them.. But then I thought, they were enjoying every bit of what they were doing..



I guess this snap gives you a picture of my view from the window.. ;)

After lots of trips to and from their homes.. with water carriers of different shapes and sizes, their baths were nowhere near full. Its then that the parents decided to help them. And guess what.. They fitted a hosepipe for them into the park. Hurraay!



As you can see, things were quite easy now.. They thanked their parents by spraying water all over them with the hose. And started filling their baths too.. And yes as the baths got full, they were very impatient.. And so was I.. And finally.. Bloooom!!



And I wished, I could dive from my window and fall into that bath too.. ;)

Dedicated to my girlfriends..

Now, before you say a 'WHAAAAT?', the girlfriend here means a female friend and nothing more.

As I was 'timepassing' yesterday(as usual), I came to know that yesterday(Aug-1) was girlfriend's day. Oh, was there a day like that? I tried to find out what one was supposed to do on this day.. Guys giving gifts to their girlfriends? Not that they need a special-day to do that.. But still, one day dedicated for gifts is not a bad idea, either. ;) But I found that it was a much more girly affair.. And the next minute, I sent an e-card wishing all my girlfriends..

As I was doing that, I realised that I was blessed with great girlfriends. I remembered the times I spent with each of them.. The fun times.. The fight times.. The senti times.. Now, as I sit miles away from them and type this, I know what exactly I am missing. I have quarreled with them, but the bond only got better every time..
I look back and see that they have been with me at every step of my life..
They have warned me when I walked on dangerous paths.. and when I didn't listen.. They just walked along holding my hand..
They laughed with me.. cried with me.. They were with me, all the time..




Girlfriend's day or not, I wish you all deep from my heart,
Thankyou for being my friend!!